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News Top 10 places for men to wear NO pants.

no pants allowed.jpg


If pants were no longer mandatory in public, would you still wear them? Would you wait to see if others went barelegged, or would you be the alpha male sans-pants in your neighborhood?

You could eat five burritos from Chipotle, go to work bottomless, and ruin every sinus near your cubicle. Or, the entire building. You could have a dance party like those kids in the street from Ireland - YouTube "Irish breakdancing" - or you could just not like pants.

Ten Places Men should go without Pants.
  1. The supermarket. Follow one person to every aisle. Buy everything they buy. Very creepy.
  2. Get fitted for a suit jacket. It gets weird when you get your cuffs and waist get measured.
  3. The dentist. Look towards your toes in that sticky vinyl chair and you'll see why everyone giggles.
  4. Your psychiatrist. Wear a backwards tuxedo shirt and act like your other personality stole your pants. Walk backwards at all times. Address your back side as the side who has a problem.
  5. Family reunion so your family can understand how you're gifted, yet not so smart.
  6. Church. Hey, they took some pants off when you were a kid. What's the problem now?
  7. Hot yoga. The smell. The sight. Ugh. When downward dog turns into a black hole.
  8. Meet your significant others parents for the first time.
  9. Best Buy - nothing but a bunch of stupid d*cks in there anyway.
  10. Go buy a cat. In fact, buy all the cats. Wear them as pants. Give the register folks a story they can tell around camp fires for centuries.
Comment below with the places you would travel wearing NO pants.
 
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